What is Love? (Part I)

Love is simply having a broader perspective in life…

            In our world today, we cannot deny the reality that there are some people who find their life miserable. There are some who abruptly loses hope especially when problems and difficulties enter their life. Some are even committed suicides or diverting their problems in their own vices such as womanizing, excessive liquor drinking, drugs and others. Thus, they assess their life in a very limited perspective or view. Personally, I believe that life is a dynamic reality in man’s existence. I believe that “the greatness of that who knows oneself as miserable” (Festin, 2000, p.29). Life is an everchanging reality I which man is obliged to live. In life it’s not only about happiness and success but its is about  sadness and failures. It’s not only about perfection but it is also about imperfections. Hence, man is Invited to have a broader perspective or view about life. We are being asked to accept the reality that human as we are, are imperfect being because a miserable being is thus one that does not know he is miserable, but to be great is to know that one is miserable. “Human being’s greatness is thus not identified with the position that he occupies in the universe. He may be the weakest among the beings in the world, but he is great because he acknowledges his insignificance” (Festin, 2000, p. 29). Hence, I believe that seeing life in a wider reality is also a kind of love. In other words, I believe that “love is also having a broader perspective in life”, and this is the thing that I had seen to my Tito Abner.

A simple father with a fantastic view in life…

              Our father is said to be the breadwinner of our family. He has to work hard to be able to support or provide our needs. He wants us to eat nutritious meals, to have a cozy home, to study in the best school, and perhaps to have all the things that we want and need. He may not always be at home like our mother but he does love us dearly. He wants us to grow up beautifully through the discipline and rewards he gives us, and these are the things that my Tito Abner is doing---to be a good father to my cousins. Abner Sanico or simply Tito Abner is a very loving husband to Tita Eva, my mother’s youngest sister. He is from Romblon. He is an industrious vendor of fishballs, the what we called “kalamares” and other street foods. Despite of being poor and having a low-income job, Tito Abner manages to send his three children, my cousins, in the school. He also sees to it that his family will get the basic things that they need such as food, clothing, health care, and others. However, aside from these realities about my Tito Abner there is also a character of him that admired me most and that is his feature of having a broader view in life.

            There are times that their business is not that good because of its low-saving income. In times like this, Tita Eva is always hot-headed. It seems like there will be no another day in which they could earn more income from their business. There are also times in which Tita Eva is so pessimistic about their life. For her, there will be no tomorrow in which they may get what they want or do what they want. For Tita Eva, life is full of sufferings and there are no chances for them to gain wealthness or some sort of life’s sweetness. But for my Tito Abner, it is really a different thing. For him, “life is simply like that, sometimes it’s sweet and sometimes it’s bitter.”  I remember him saying these words, “ganyan lang naman talaga ang buhay balong, kasama naman talaga sa buhay ng tao ang mga problemang ‘yan. Kapag hindi na tayo namromroblema ibig sabihin hindi na tayo tao.” Honestly, I admire Tito Abner. He is a one of a kind person. He is a simple father with a fantastic view in life and that inspired me most. Thus, I really realized a different kind of love because of him.

            I realized that love is not only the good things in life. Love is not only realize when all things are being possessed by you. Love is not only when you have no problems but it is also about having difficulties. It is also about the thing or things that you do not have. It is also about the reality that we as humans have problems in life. Love is also accepting that we are imperfect, that our life is not that geared to what we call perfection. Thus, love is also having a wider reality about life. “Human life is a matter not so much of having all good things as of choosing from them. Man is presented among the many possibilities in life” (Kierkegaard, 1990, p. 18).